I recently wrote an article for the website I contribute to concerning New Year’s Resolutions. You can read the article here; http://homefrontunited.com/2014/01/everyday-is-a-new-years-resolution/
One of the things that I have found important in making and keeping New Year’s resolutions is to follow the five steps I outlined in the article.
1. Be specific
2. Be consistent
3. Be accepting
4. Be supported
5. Be rewarded
Real change is never easy. Real change can be extremely difficult because it may involve changing not only yourself but the environment you live your life in… a change in location, a change in relationships, a change in beliefs. Let’s face it, change is never just this one thing, change is often a decision to live your life in a different way. The “diets” that seem to work the best are those that treat it as a “lifestyle” change. I think this diet mentality can work well for any positive changes you intend to make in your life- and I’m going to put it to the test.
I have several changes I need to make, some out of necessity and some just because I want to grow as a person. 2014 is the year I’m dedicating to my personal growth and healing. And I would love to have you all join me on the journey. I’m going to follow the five steps, and use this blog as a way to connect with others interested in changing and report my progress. So let’s start with step one.
Be specific; I have several things I need to achieve in the coming year, at the top of the list are the following;
1. I need to find a job that fulfills my need to be finanically secure and creative
2. I need to find a place to live that is affordable, safe, and appeals to my asthetic sensibilities
3. I want a relationship that stimulates my growth, returns my love equally, and supports me fully.
4. I want more social interactions with friends and family. I rarely want to be alone on a weekend, and I never want to be alone on a holiday again. I want people to cook for, I want a group of people to go on adventures with, I want a full house as often as possible. I want to spend time with my nieces doing fun things that teach them how special they are. I want to be embraced with love, support and positive energy. I want to feel as though I belong.
5. I want to be more physically and emotionally healthy. I want to be able to be more physically active, not to run a marathon or bike cross country- but to be pain free, and not have to turn down an adventure because of physical limitations. I want to be more positive, letting go of anger, find my sensuality, and heal old wounds.
So that is my list, all of which I feel and believe is possible if I begin by following step number two- which is to be consistent. Consistency to me means working at each of these five goals on a daily basis. The key to this is as Ghandi has said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”
I think the best way to approach this daily consistency is with small steps. The job search is going to be my full-time job from now until I am hired. I will dedicate 2-4 hours a day applying and following up on applications. I will go to hiring fairs, find ways to improve my chances of landing a job- etc. Once I have met the goal of getting hired, I’ll use that time to finding a place to live. I will ask my friends and family in the area to check out possible locations and to give me their feedback.
The next two goals to work on will require me to “Be the Change”. If I want a relationship of any kind, I have to be the person I’d want to be in a relastionship with. If I want someone supportive, I have to be supportive. If I want someone to cook for, I have to let someone cook for me. You get the point.
The goal of being more healthy emotionally and physically are connected with the rest. Physically I’m going to move more. I walk the dogs everyday, and I’m adding yoga three times a week and “Shimmy” a belly dance work out twice a week. Emotionally I’m going to read and practice specific goals toward my emotional health. I’m a big fan of the 30 day challenges. So I’m going to design 30 day challenges to help me reach more emotional health.
My first 30 Day Challenge is going to be about having a positive attitude. For the next 30 days I’m going to appreciate even the setbacks in my life. When I find myself getting frustrated or angry, I’m going to STOP- Stop, Take a breath, Observe, Proceed with love and kindness. I will not say anything negative or demeaning about another person. I won’t participate in a conversation with someone being negative or demeaning about others. I will appreciate my mistakes, frustrations and anger as a lesson rather than allowing myself to get bogged down in the temporary negative emotions. If I feel myself getting angry or negative, I’ll try to refocus on what lesson I need to learn and focus on being positive! I might even take photographs of things for Instagram that make me feel positive!
Who’s with me?